Miss Congeniality Takes the Gold
Instead of giving you a play-by-play*, I’ll just share some of my thoughts on this year’s Oscars.
*I’ve updated my predictions post with the outcome if you want to see how I fared. Not too shabby if I do say so myself. I’m gifted in the area of guessing.
The Opening/Hosts
I’m a fan. I like the old-Hollywood vibe. The set, the understated two-handed comedy routine, the sparkling Neil Patrick Harris awesomeness: very Vegas nightclub circa the Sinatra days. Or the golden age of MGM. A dapper Fred Astaire would have fit in. Or better, he should have replaced the So You Think You Can Dance oddness.
Fashion Moments (Not Mentioned Here)
Robert Downey Jr. kills it. Arguably the best personal style in town. And Tina’s smokin’.
Zoe Saldana is wearing Fraggle Rock Couture.
Ben Stiller for Best Dressed. Crazy man. “It was this or the Nazi uniform. But this show seemed a little Hitler-heavy….”
Sam Worthington wins Best Glasses.
Remembering John Hughes
I am too young to claim that John Hughes captured my generation (save for Home Alone). I had to learn about the Brat Pack after the fact. But Ferris Bueller still resonated with me. Molly Ringwald still makes me smile. And apparently, as evidenced by the tribute, the actors Hughes made famous all grew up to be the weathered boring adults his movies warned against. (Poor Judd Nelson. Eek.)
My Random Brain
1. Colin Firth presents An Education for no reason. He’s this image of gentlemanly sophistication, and yet I can’t help but hear “I don’t give a flying fart in space” when he speaks. Poor man. (Have you seen What a Girl Wants? If not, you won’t understand.)
2. Confession: I don’t understand why Sigourney Weaver is famous.
Second confession: Sometimes I confuse her with Geena Davis. Even though I adore Geena.
3. I LOVE that Emily Blunt is going to marry John Krasinski. Not that they need my approval….
Horror Tribute
Who invited the kids from Twilight? And who defined “horror”? Apparently Beetle Juice fits the category? Edward Scissorhands? How does Tim Burton feel about this? I am so confused. Maybe the Twilight kids made the montage….
THAT Voice
Morgan Freeman explains how awesome sound is. I believe him. He also convinces me that The Dark Knight should win something.
Huh?
Best Cinematography goes to Avatar. Didn’t think it was possible to win an award for capturing green-screen nothingness on the camera. Avatar is a post-production movie, Academy. But maybe I’m just dumb.
I See Dead People
James Taylor is making sure that we’re really sad about all the dead people. And Demi Moore’s presence is reminding us to rent Ghost and cry over Patrick Swayze. There is no mention of Farrah Fawcett or Bea Arthur. There will be VERY angry letters….
Thanks, But No Thanks
Gerald Butler and Bradley Cooper presenting together? Shudder. They share the “Nadine Does Not Want To Date You” Award.
It’s LOST Night
Evangeline Lilly is in The Hurt Locker. Michelle Rodriguez is in Avatar. Michael Giacchino composed Up’s score. Fisher Stevens produced The Cove.
If you work on the show Lost, your off-season project will win an Oscar.
The Big Exciting Awards That Make Me Cheer:
Best Actor
The tributes are moving. Jeff Bridges almost cries. But these tributes sound like character references. I guess you don’t qualify if you’re a scumbag. But you deserve Best Actor if you’re a man of integrity…?
JEFF BRIDGES! So happy. Standing ovation. I cared so much about this category. I don’t even know why. His brilliant stoner-guy-meets-articulate-artist enthusiasm makes me want to make movies. His adoration for his wife makes me want to get married.*
*Maybe to Colin Farrell. Since he likes to spoon (uh, with Jeremy Renner).
Best Actress
I forgot that Forest Whittaker directed Hope Floats. So random.
SANDY!!! I am giddy. You have no idea. She’s darling and eloquent and hilarious and touching and perfect. She won a Razzie and Oscar in the same weekend. That is impressive.
Best Director
Kathryn Bigelow. “The time has come.” Yes, it has. The most “muscular” film of the year had a woman behind it. So there.
Best Picture
And….THE HURT LOCKER. Phew. The little movie that could. It was supposed to be a direct-to-DVD release. (As was Slumdog Millionaire. Huh.) And now it’s a history-making award-winning film.
I hope that the win means that people will now actually see it. It really is an excellent piece of filmmaking. It’s the Full Metal Jacket for my generation. Go rent the DVD. Now.
What did you think of the show, friends?